LISTSERV mailing list manager LISTSERV 16.0

Help for CALONTIR Archives


CALONTIR Archives

CALONTIR Archives


CALONTIR@LISTSERV.UNL.EDU


View:

Message:

[

First

|

Previous

|

Next

|

Last

]

By Topic:

[

First

|

Previous

|

Next

|

Last

]

By Author:

[

First

|

Previous

|

Next

|

Last

]

Font:

Proportional Font

LISTSERV Archives

LISTSERV Archives

CALONTIR Home

CALONTIR Home

CALONTIR  September 2011

CALONTIR September 2011

Subject:

The Lump

From:

Stefan li Rous <[log in to unmask]>

Reply-To:

Historical Recreation in the Kingdom of Calontir <[log in to unmask]>

Date:

Thu, 29 Sep 2011 23:18:57 -0500

Content-Type:

text/plain

Parts/Attachments:

Parts/Attachments

text/plain (140 lines)

On Sep 29, 2011, at 7:51 AM, Mark Schuldenfrei wrote:

> Stefan li Rous <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>> While I have a story in the Florilegium about a SCAdian buying a
>> second seat to bring home a rock or some such, I'm not sure it would
>> work with an anvil.
>
> Gosh, I remember that story from when it was first posted on  
> rec.org.sca. Not as funny as the Canadian Wallpaper Festival but  
> still a riot.
>
>        Tibor

Thank you for verifying that I'm not crazy. Or at least not  
fantasizing. The other day I could not locate the story using the  
search engine in the Florilegium, but after I saw your message I  
decided to look through each of the four SCA-Stories-msg files in the  
Florilegium, and I found it in the first one.

SCA-stories1-msg  (95K)  4/27/94  SCA stories related before 5/1/94.
http://www.florilegium.org/files/STORIES/SCA-stories1-msg.html

So, for everyone's further enjoyment, here it is. As Thomas states,  
this is not strictly related to the SCA, but it is the kind of thing  
that I can imagine many SCA folks getting involved in.  This was  
pre-2001. I'm not sure that this story would have gone this way in  
today's more officious/paranoid times.

=============
From: dolata at lead.uazaic.arizona.edu (Dolata)
Date: 17 May 91 21:50:31 GMT
Organization: University of Arizona AI Chemistry Lab, Tucson, AZ
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca

Dearest Gentles...

         I pray your indulgence,  for the following story is not
strictly related to the SCA,  but does pertain to activities surrounding
historical research pursuent to SCA interests.  And, mayhaps you will
find it amusing...   I have several other such stories,  and if my
dear readers do find some amusement in this story,  then I would be
pleased to present them.

         Yours in Service,
         Thomas Ignatius Perigrinus
         Minister of Arts and Sciences
         College of St Felix (choose your favorite,  there are 17 St.  
Felixs)

The Lump

         While I was working in Sweden,  I had many chances to visit  
London.
Through a strange set of circumstances, while performing historical  
research
I was able to be of service to the Abbot of Westminster Abbey.
As a reward,  I was presented with a weather worn carved capital from  
the
Chapel of Henry VI'th which was being replaced with a new one.  (The  
service
had pertained to this restoration work)  Although weatherworn and a bit
crumbly,  it is delicately carved, and so I worked hard to protect it.
Since it weighs 50+ pounds, this was not easy.

         Fortunately,  I had traveled from Sweden to England with my  
good
Lady, her Mother, and her sister...   Even though the latter two of  
our party
were planning to travel onwards, rather than return to Sweden,  it had  
been
cheapest to buy everyone round trip tickets...   So the fact that I  
had a 50+
pound chunk of Westminster Abbey didn't seem like it would present a  
problem...
I had a pair of spare return trip tickets.  It could fly as a  
passanger!!!!

         Check in was fun...    "I'd like to check in three to  
Sweden..."
presenting the tickets...   "Yes sir...   would you put your carry on
bag on the scale???"   "No,  that's one of the passangers".   "Yes, sir,
would you put _their_ bag on the scale."   "No,  I didn't make myself  
clear.
That is not a bag belonging to a passanger... that bag is the  
passanger."
"Excuse me sir...   did you say the BAG is the PASSANGER?"   "Yes,  and
it would like a window seat."    At this point they decided I was  
definately
daft,  and I spent th next ten minutes talking to various managers...
Finally that was cleared up, and the bag got it's window seat.

         Arriving at the security gate,  I placed my bag firmly (ka- 
thunk)
on the x-ray machine...  and of course no x-rays penetrated the rock...
So they asked me;  "What do you have in there, a rock?" "Why yes, I do".
"Well sir, could you be so kind as to open it?" "But of course..."
Well, they were very amused, but seeing as how I had the foresight
to obtain a legal possesion and export document, they finally let it  
through.

         I thought I had it made,  but the people at the boarding gate
noticed that I was lugging this bag as if it contained somewhat over the
14 pounds weight allowance for carry on luggage.  Also, I was treating
it gingerly since it is a irreplaceable thing,  and I didn't want to
damage it...  "Excuse me sir, but if that bag weighs more than 14
pounds you will have to check it..."   "No,  thats okay,  it isn't a  
bag,
it's a passanger with it's own ticket... right here."  With that,
I showed the ticket. "Yes sir, where is the person who's ticket this
is?" "No, let me make it clear, this bag is the passanger, it is going
to sit in a seat, next to the window." "Yes, sir, could you kindly
step into the security office with us?..."     Sigh...

         Finally we board the airplane...  I thought we had it made...
But alas,  fate had a bit more planned for me.  Shortly after the plane
buttoned up,  the stewardess came around and asked me if I could move
the bag off of the seat (It was firmly seat belted in place), because
a passanger wanted to move to the window (I should have realized that
might cause problems). "No,  I am afraid I won't move the bag,  and
besides,  I have paid for that seat...."   "Well yes sir,  if that is
your reserved seat,  than could you sit in it and give the other  
gentleman
the seat you are sitting in?"  "I'm afraid I have not made it clear...
I have paid for a ticket for the bag...  it is a passanger.  That is  
it's
reserved seat....  I have a ticket, I am a passanger, and this is my
reserved seat.  We are both passangers, with tickets, and reserved
seats...  (and trying to suprress a grin)  And we would both like the
chicken entree."  ....  eventually I was able to convince the co-pilot  
that
the bag was a bona-fide passanger with a ticket,  that it didn't  
constitute
a threat to the welfare of the airplane,  and that it did have a right  
to
both the window seat and the chicken entree...
--------
THLord Stefan li Rous    Barony of Bryn Gwlad    Kingdom of Ansteorra
    Mark S. Harris           Austin, Texas          [log in to unmask]
http://www.linkedin.com/in/marksharris
**** See Stefan's Florilegium files at:  http://www.florilegium.org ****

Top of Message | Previous Page | Permalink

Advanced Options


Options

Log In

Log In

Get Password

Get Password


Search Archives

Search Archives


Subscribe or Unsubscribe

Subscribe or Unsubscribe


Archives

December 2017
November 2017
October 2017
September 2017
August 2017
July 2017
June 2017
May 2017
April 2017
March 2017
February 2017
January 2017
December 2016
November 2016
October 2016
September 2016
August 2016
July 2016
June 2016
May 2016
April 2016
March 2016
February 2016
January 2016
December 2015
November 2015
October 2015
September 2015
August 2015
July 2015
June 2015
May 2015
April 2015
March 2015
February 2015
January 2015
December 2014
November 2014
October 2014
September 2014
August 2014
July 2014
June 2014
May 2014
April 2014
March 2014
February 2014
January 2014
December 2013
November 2013
October 2013
September 2013
August 2013
July 2013
June 2013
May 2013
April 2013
March 2013
February 2013
January 2013
December 2012
November 2012
October 2012
September 2012
August 2012
July 2012
June 2012
May 2012
April 2012
March 2012
February 2012
January 2012
December 2011
November 2011
October 2011
September 2011
August 2011
July 2011
June 2011
May 2011
April 2011
March 2011
February 2011
January 2011
December 2010
November 2010
October 2010
September 2010
August 2010
July 2010
June 2010
May 2010
April 2010
March 2010
February 2010
January 2010
December 2009
November 2009
October 2009
September 2009
August 2009
July 2009
June 2009
May 2009
April 2009
March 2009
February 2009
January 2009
December 2008
November 2008
October 2008
September 2008
August 2008
July 2008
June 2008
May 2008
April 2008
March 2008
February 2008
January 2008
December 2007
November 2007
October 2007
September 2007
August 2007
July 2007
June 2007
May 2007
April 2007
March 2007
February 2007
January 2007
December 2006
November 2006
October 2006
September 2006
August 2006
July 2006
June 2006
May 2006
April 2006
March 2006
February 2006
January 2006
December 2005
November 2005
October 2005
September 2005
August 2005
July 2005
June 2005
May 2005
April 2005
March 2005
February 2005
January 2005
December 2004
November 2004
October 2004
September 2004
August 2004
July 2004
June 2004
May 2004
April 2004
March 2004
February 2004
January 2004

ATOM RSS1 RSS2



LISTSERV.UNL.EDU

CataList Email List Search Powered by the LISTSERV Email List Manager