Below is a compilation of actual student bloopers collected by
teachers from 8th grade through college.
1) Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all wrote in
hydraulics. They lived in the Sarah Dessert and traveled by Camelot.
The climate of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants have to live
2) The Bible is full of interesting caricatures. In the first book of
the Bible, Guinessis, Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree.
One of their children, Cain, asked, "Am I my brother's son?"
3) Moses led the hebrew slaves to the Red Sea, where they made
unleavened bread which is bread made without any ingredients. Moses
went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten commandments. He died before
he ever reached Canada.
4) Solomom had three hundred wives and seven hundred porcupines.
5) The Greeks were a highly sculptured people, and without them we
wouldn't have history. The Greeks also had myths. A myth is a female
6) Actually, Homer was not written by Homer but by another man of that
7) Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people
advice. They killed him. Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock.
After his death, his career suffered a dramatic decline.
8) In the Olympic games, Greeks ran races, jumped, hurled the
biscuits, and threw the java.
9) Eventually, the Romans conquered the Greeks. History calls people
Romans because they never stayed in one place for very long.
10) Julius Caesar extinguished himself on the battlefields of Gaul.
The Ides of March murdered him because they thought he was going to be
made king. Dying, he gasped out: "Tee hee, Brutus."
11) Nero was a cruel tyranny who would torture his subjects by playing
the fiddle to them.
12) Joan of Arc was burnt to a steak and was cannonized by Bernard
13) Finally Magna Carta provided that no man should be hanged twice
for the same offense.
14) In midevil times most people were alliterate. The greatest writer
of the futile ages was Chaucer, who wrote many poems and verses and
also wrote literature.
15) Another story was William Tell, who shot an arrow through an apple
while standing on his son's head.
16) Queen Elizabeth was the "Virgin Queen." As a queen she was a
success. When she exposed herself before her troops they all shouted